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Social Etiquette
Malaysians are usually called by their given names preceded by Mr., Mrs., or Miss. The Chinese use their family names preceded by Mr., Mrs., or Miss.
When addressing a titled person you can just use his title without his name. "Datuk" (sometimes spelt Dato or Dato'), which literally means grandfather, is a title conferred to prominent Malaysians by the King or Sultans on their birthdays. The wife of a "Datuk" should be addressed as "Datin" but if it is a woman who is conferred with the title of "Datuk" (which is quite rare) her husband is not affected by her title. Higher up on the title hierarchy is "Tan Sri" (similar to "Sir" in Britain) and the wife of a "Tan Sri" should be addressed as "Puan Sri".
Even rarer still is "Tun" (similar to "Lord" in Britain). In fact "Tun" is the highest non-royal title and is limited to 22 holders at any one time. The wife of a "Tun" is addressed as "Toh Puan".
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A firm handshake and a "hello" are suitable as a greeting. Muslims bring their hand to their chest after shaking hands, and you should follow suit. Business cards are always exchanged and should be both given and received with both hands at all times. Study the card for a few moments and do not simply put the card straight into your pocket. Put the card in your card holder or keep the card on your desk. Do not write on the business card of your business partner. A suit and tie is suitable business attire for men, with the jacket removed on warmer days.
Long-sleeved batik shirts are always acceptable. For women, a suit or blouse and skirt are best for daytime appointments. The many cultures and religions of Malaysia may make giving a suitable gift a complicated issue:
Never give liquor to a Muslim person as alcoholic beverages are forbidden in the Muslim religion. Do not give clocks, watches, knives or white flowers to a Chinese person as white flowers are associated with death in Chinese culture, and so are clocks, knives and watches - the word for time and death sound similar.
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Although handshakes generally suffice for both men and women, some Muslim ladies may instead acknowledge an introduction with a gentleman via a nod of her head and a smile. A handshake is ONLY to be reciprocated IF the lady offers her hand first. The traditional Malay greeting of 'Salam' resembles a handshake with both hands but without the grasp. The man offers both hands, lightly touches his friend's outstretched hands, then brings his hands to his chest to mean, ' I greet you from my heart'. The visitor should reciprocate the 'Salam' in the same manner.
It is polite to call your Malaysian friend BEFORE visiting their home and shoes must be REMOVED when entering a Malaysian home. It is also customary to do so before entering a Mosque or an Indian temple. Your RIGHT HAND is always used when eating with one's hand or when giving and receiving objects. Try not to look too shocked if you see many Malaysians here eating their meals in public places with their right hand instead of using utensils like fork and spoon. Malaysian people are very hospitable and they always welcome their guests with some drinks and it is courteous to accept this offer.
Women should remember to be covered up with long sleeve and long dress / pants before entering a mosque. Due to the warm weather, many people wear shorts & T-shirts, so some mosques provide free robes and and scarves for ladies at the entrance.
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